Our utopia

 As we have expressed previously, we detest critiquing films purely based on their ideological content. Nevertheless, we thought we'd try our hand at moralism. Some of these movies we will most likely never watch again, but all of them are in essence personal stories (which we love) and never try to cram their ideology down the viewers' throat (which we hate) and all of them left an enormous impression on us. These are in no particular order as we are unable to rate which of our beliefs is the most important.

1. The Human Condition (1959 - 1961) - Anti-imperialism, anti-militarism & anti-authority

Yes, yes. It's a trilogy, but you can't pick just one! Unsurprisingly we couldn't find a movie that's anti-imperialist or anti-military from Hollywood. These films portray convincingly that blind allegiance to authority can lead the masses to commit or accept the most horrific actions. The films are very critical of the hierarchy and purpose of the military in general. These are the only movies we have seen that criticise so fundamentally its own country's history of imperialism and militarism. They are a heavy watch, but definitely a must-see for everyone.

2. The Eternal Road (2017) - Pacifism

This is the one Finnish movie that truly spoke to us. We have a few others we could recommend from Finnish cinema, but this is the one for us. Unlike in The Human Condition, which is against violence and war, The Eternal Road is decidedly for pacifism, non-violent resistance and peaceful living. This comes across because the main character in the previous  has somewhat a regressive arc and in the latter the main character never wavers in his principles.

3. Captain Fantastic (2016) - Libertarian socialism

The movie's conclusion is basically a compromise between the main character's unyielding utopian ideals and reality, which is the understanding that one can retain one's ideals while being part of a larger society. 

4. The Apartment (1960) - Anti-capitalism & anti-corporatism

The Apartment shows the hollowness of the corporate world, that you're nothing but a cog in a machine and everything is commodified, especially lower-class women. And the only way to avoid that is to leave. We of course go a step futher and say burn it all down.

5. On the Waterfront (1954) - Pro-union & Christian socialism

We don't buy in to the divine aspects of Christianity, but admittedly Jesus had some pretty rad ideas.We endorse the insights that unions are not really unions (or at least are not effective) unless workers are the ones who get to represent themselves and that for unions to prevail you need solidarity between workers.

6. Free State of Jones (2016) - Class struggle, solidarity & democracy

We like the idea that economic oppression is what can unite people across all human experience and bring about meaningful change and that it's nigh impossible to achieve that without democracy. It additionally shows that democracy is not democracy unless everyone is equal and has equal rights before the law. We recommend you also read up on Fred Hampton and The Black Panthers, The Young Lords and The Young Patriots in Chicago. It might as well be this story but with a black lead. 

7. Ikiru (1952) - Government bureucracy & value of community

Because we believe in democratic parlamentarism we also have to accept that bureucracy is necessary. But what kind of bureucracy it should be is what this film addresses. Bureucracy should be transparent, as simple as possible and work for the benefit of the citizens. People from the community should be the ones who work in the bureucracy for it to be effecive.

8. Princess Mononoke (1997) - Eco-socialism & environmentalism

Socialism that is based on the same industrial model as capitalism leads to the same conclusion: the exploitation and destruction of nature. If we didn't love entertainment so goddamn much, we would be borderline Luddites. Much like this film. 

9. Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939) - Political corruption & parlamentarism

This movie essentially depicts what we think that political corruption often is; the merging of corporate (private) and governmental (public) power and influence. It also shows that this corruption makes parlamentarism impossible as your elected officials do not represent you, the voter, but rather monied private interests.

10. Silence (2016) - Spirituality & religious beliefs

Scorsese has always expertly portrayed his approach to faith and religion, particulary to Christianity. And since we have been raised Christian, we share that worldview and feel affinity with how Scorsese presents the doubt in your own faith and religion. While we personally no longer believe in deities or divinity, we have no desire to deny that spirituality and personal religious beliefs can bring comfort and meaning to others. However, we can never say the same about organised religion.

11. Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (1984) - Humanism

Humanism for us doesn't mean that you simply extend your sympathies to other human beings but to all existence and life. Since we eat industrially produced animal products, we are hypocrites in our humanism as much as we are in all the other ideals. That's why this post is called "our utopia". But that's also part of humanism, that everyone errs. One big reason why we picked Nausicaä, although read the manga as well.

12. Dead Man Walking (1995) - Anti-death penalty & prisoner reformation

We are adamantly against the death penalty in any instance. We can't even comprehend how any American can sleep knowing that 4 % of death row inmates are or have been innocent of the crime they have been convicted for. We do not believe in "an eye for an eye" but we understand the impulse, we have that too. It doesn't mean we or the state should act on it. Humanity in general should strive for better, and that's where prisoner reformation comes in. It's a heavy and complex subject and it would be impossible to convey all we think about it in a few sentences. It has to do with how the society is formed, what laws are decreed (and for whom) and enacted and how the society participates in preventing marginalisation of people.

13. Portrait of a Lady on Fire (2019) - Feminism & equality

Even though this is a historical piece, the subject matter makes it relevant. Yes, there isn't as much class analysis, but that's kind of not the point. The point is that no matter your social standing, if you are a woman your path has already been made. It would do you well to remeber though, that neither of the women have their own property or money, and that the artist has to paint under her father's name to gain any independence. 

We have a few honourable mentions that we must include. If Beale Street Could Talk (2018, racism & class), Wag the Dog (1997, media & manufacturing consent), Norma Rae (1979, pro-union & feminist socialism), The Mission (1986, spirituality & religious beliefs, not the Christian imperialism), Arrival (2016, anti-militarism & diplomacy), The Bad Sleep Well (1960, anti-capitalism & anti-corruption), Tokyo Godfathers (2003, humanism). Since we chose to only include films we could not take our Bible for pacifist philosophy, which is Trigun (1998) obviously.

Pick of the month

 Noir (2001)

It seems we're still not over anime. But honestly, this show deserves way more recognition than what it currently has. Surely one of the reasons for that is because it's purely about women and the only romantic undertones are between the leads without any sexy business. Its Imdb rating is criminally low. This show surpasses Cowboy Bebop by a mile and a half. Even the soundtrack is much better (and we love Yoko Kanno). However, Noir is Kajiura at her best. The visual style is stunning all around, particularly the use of shadows. Perhaps it has not garnered as much attention as other shows as well because men are completely irrelevant to the story.

This show is a slow burner so one does require patience in the beginning. It will pay off though, we promise. If you like character driven narratives with cool action, this is the show for you. Additionally, it's not bleak as fuck. 

Anime in retrospect

First, some background on why we got into this now very popular form of entertainment. Way before anime, we  were obsessed with anything fantasy-related. We read all the fantasy books in our tiny village library and then, after moving, raided the city library for all the rest. Also, we were practically raised on Disney & other quality Western animations. After a few years of our fantasy period, the two finally merged in the form of anime. Fantasy + animation - how could we, in our early teens, resist the temptation? We couldn't, thus we spent the better part of our teen years obsessed about anime. This was also way before anime became popular in the European mainstream and was mostly only known either in the gamer or art movie circles. We've always preferred liking things that were more unknown or weren't the most popular in our immediate circle. So, anime fit like a glove in that aspect as well. Then, some time passed, we got a little older, anime became more popular in Europe, and we had been burned by so many anime shows, that we just naturally lost interest in it. Miyazaki, of course, was never really anime to us, so he stayed as the only reminder of, to us then, our embarrassing anime years. 

Along the years, we re-watched all of our old favourites, and came to the conclusion that Trigun is actually one of the best shows ever, so we couldn't include it being anime. Because anime was something shameful. And then came corona and returned us, like a time machine, back to our teen years (well, that and Hollywood's complete creative bankcruptcy). It has forced us to come out of the anime closet and admit to ourselves that we actually like this shit, embarrassing or not and no matter how much anime still has things that we absolutely hate (which we will go over in detail). The point of this post is to clarify to ourselves why we still like anime, while also still hating anime at the same time. We have a history of loving fantasy (as noted in the beginning) and the first anime anything we saw was Princess Mononoke. It had something that Western cinema never had for us (especially the fantasy genre) nor do we believe will ever have. Epicness tied with deep and thoughtful material. We'll divide this post into two - first we are going to go through what we consider to be singular in anime and which we find fascinating. Second, we are going to look at aspects that we absolutely loathe in anime.

Mononoke - epic and deep

 

If it hasn't become abundantly clear from our previous posts, we are indeed bleeding-heart pacifists and this particular theme pops up surprisingly often in anime. Not only that, but other themes related to pacifism, like war and violence, also feature heavily in anime that we fancy. Themes are one of the biggest reasons why we like a film or a show and especially tying a theme to a character's narrative grabs our attention. These themes also greatly appeal to us because we hail from a nation where the devastation of war is still somewhat fresh in our national consciousness. The war stories are also passed down from generation to generation, since pretty much everybody's grandparents served in the war. We assume some of this might have some similarity to Japan (after all, we were both allies to the Nazis) and especially the dropping of the atom bombs have clearly affected the Japanese psyche, which is pretty clear from the numerous examples of nuclear imagery that is presented everywhere in anime. Continuing on the theme alley -  anime has some of the most fucked-up shit you could ever witness anywhere. In the best possible way. Seriously, Game of Thrones has nothing on anime. The most vile disgusting person may find redemption, you might cheer on a relationship where the couple consists of a wife beater and his abused wife or a psycho brainwashed kid unhealthily obsessed with a girl. And then you end up liking characters that are ambiguous if not straight up unsavoury. This is not something one often finds in Western entertainment - you have your share of fucked-uppedness, anti-heroes and even somewhat sympathethic villains but not to the degree that we have found in anime. Anime often has the whole "two ideologies clash against each other", whereas Western films or shows are mostly focused on proving the "good guys" right. 

Vash - probably the most subversive male character ever

 

Probably one of the reasons we've been drawn to visual medium is because it has to combine so many different forms of expression - picture, words and sound. Sound for us has always represented music and a film's soundtrack can greatly sway our opinion on the movie as a whole. Anime has gone downhill the same way Hollywood has in original score material but in the 90's and 2000's anime truly had some of the most awe-inspiring soundtracks one can find anywhere. Anime also had a longer time to hold on, since Hollywood started to suck in the music department once Christopher Nolan showed up. It's not only that the music was great during those heydays of anime, but how they used the music in the shows. Combining visuals and music expertly will get us interested. The 90's and early 2000's anime really excelled at this storytelling via music and visuals (our favourite female composers, Yuki Kajiura & Yoko Kanno, also come from this era). Another thing that anime has is, of course, the animation itself - we are old-school and do not find nearly as much value in CGI that many others do. No, we've always admired hand-drawn animation more, whether it's the very time-consuming actual hand-drawn animation or its modern variation, 2D. Anime also has some of the most memorable character designs. Anime that we would unreservedly recommend to anyone that fullfill the aforementioned requirements are eg. - Trigun (duh!), Evangelion (no anime has looked better and don't @ us), Noir (excellent in both the music and visuals department, plus the complex female characters), Koe no Katachi (for a modern anime it has amazing storytelling visuals) and obviously, anything by Miyazaki. Unfortunately, the festering of CGI has infected most of modern anime as well and this started around 2004-05, and the time before that (2000-04) is something we like to call a "transition period" when anime was gradually changing in style and substance.  

Evangelion - beautiful yet disturbing imagery

 

Now here comes all the painful stuff we've come across in anime so, so, so, so very many times. Number one issue - female representation. Jesus Christ, anime is filled to the brim with these big-tittied worshipful teen girls who are continuously sexualized while simultaneously remaining utterly sexless. It's amazing, really. Anime has truly taken to heart the whole "sexy virgin" trope. Also, women (or girls) who have sex being punished by death or torture, is a little something anime clearly stole from the horror genre. Note here, that we mostly saw anime that was directed to boys, ie. shonen as it's generally called, and surprisingly, once we started to watch stuff directed more to girls, ie. shojo (and not the magical girl kind), we were shocked to discover that shojo often treats its male characters much better than shonen does its females. The men in shojo at the very least are usually given something of their own, separate from the main character, whereas women in shonen barely ever have anything separate from the main character, not to mention a narrative arc of their own. The one trope that raises our blood pressure the most in this department is a phenomenon we have dubbed as " the worship girl". She is something one comes across quite frequently in these boy animes - a (main) female character whose only purpose is to focus on the boy hero, they have no other life besides the man, nothing of their own that would be separate from the main character, they do not challenge the male lead in any way and their thoughts pretty much revolve around the main character. They also rarely have anything significant to do in the story. It does not matter whether the female character is physically strong or her personality is different from the usual "cheerful anime girl", these traits make her a "worship girl" and ultimately entirely unrelatable. You have a myriad of examples to choose from but if we had to put down our most hated ones, they would go thusly - Kaoru and Misao from Kenshin, Mikasa from Attack on Titan, Sakura and Hinata from Naruto and Uraraka from My Hero Academy. And that's just a tip of the iceberg. 

Kaoru - the original "worship girl"

 

Another trope that one sees in anime is "power accumulation" and with that the "big bad evil" because a story always needs an antagonist. "Power accumulation"is mainly the main hero continuously getting more and more powerful, often in order to match the "big bad evil". The "power accumulation" boy character (and it is far more often a boy than a man) is also frequently a very boring character, who has no other motive than wanting to be powerful or a hero just because. They are often endlessly optimistic as well. Also, in these stories, one is usually promised more intrigue from the villain but then in the end it's just a "big bad evil" that must be defeated. The female character in these "power accumulation" shows is also quite often a busty "worship girl" who is pretty much presented as a prize to the boy for his hard work. So basically, a male power fantasy. Shojo does have the "undying love from an older man" female fantasy too, they just give their male characters a personality, if nothing else. Something else that plagues these "power accumulation" stories as well, is that their main stories, much like their main lead, is a total borefest and instead their side stories (and minor characters) usually end up being far more interesting than anything else in the show. Examples of these kinds of series are again, found in abundance - most famous one probably being Dragon Ball Z and close behind it, Naruto. 

Currently the most popular "power accumulation" series - My Hero Academy

 

And now probably comes our most hated trope in all of anime - which we are calling "destiny love". Anime can't do romance. There, we said it. Seriously, try to prove us wrong - with the endless love triangles, forced conflict and "worship girl" syndrome, how CAN one write a good romance? Romance in anime is unfortunately the kind we have termed "Luke and Leia" ie. boring and obvious. The romantic couple often has some supernatural connection that lazy writers come up with when they can't bother to write and create actual dialogue and chemistry between the couples. Our most hated example of this trope is, you guessed it, Kimi no nawa. It's a bad sign if your hentai (ie. porn) has better romance than your actual shows. The last trope that inhibits especially the more serious anime is something we've dubbed "bleak as fuck". This term means basically nothing means anything, everything is shitty, in a word, nihilism. We can be okay with this, but we must say that for especially series, we couldn't be bothered. After all, watching a movie that is all nihilistic is completely different than watching a show where nothing means really anything that lasts double or triple the time. In anime, this bleakness can sometimes also come out of nowhere which then fucks both the characters and the story (like for example, El Cazador, where the bleakness was not warranted). Also, a big problem for us in these "bleak as fuck" shows is that they frequently lack a character narrative and focus more on concept - we do like concept driven series (like Evangelion) but the bleakness often also makes the characters more distant and unrelatable, so in the end one is left with just the concept and that ain't what we look for in fiction. 

Kimi no nawa - destiny love at its cheesiest

 

In the end, the reason why anime still has its hooks on us, is because it has themes and characters that Western fiction just wouldn't come up with. Whatever else, anime is unique, and why our interest continues is because it gives you something amazingly different but then at the last minute punches you in the gut and fucks you over. We hate it. It's torture, but we can't seem to give up hope that someday one of these shows will deliver.

 

    

   

Random anime/manga recommendations

The first thing one might notice about this list is that it is missing probably the two most venerated series of all anime, namely Cowboy Bebop and Death Note. Neither of the shows had any appeal to us, but if one is interested in visual and highly stylized storytelling, Cowboy Bebop is a pretty safe bet. It does look amazing. Although, if you're into Yoko Kanno's music, Vision of Escaflowne's soundtrack is the superior of the two. Death Note is your basic nihilism, and we're not into nihilism (best part of the entire show was the cat-and-mouse game of the two lead characters and once that was over, our interest waned). Basically this list is just an accumulation of all the random shit we've seen and you could do worse than flip through them. Simply remember that anime is somewhat of an acquired taste, it's not for everyone.

1. Trigun. Because it's perfect. We wrote about this series exhaustively so we don't see the need to expand further. Except that every person identifying as male should see this show.  The artistic style might seem too simplistic at first, but stick with it; it won't seem that way after a while.

1. Princess Mononoke. It's one of our favourite movies ever. Of course it has to tie with one of our favourite TV shows ever. Miyazaki (together with Hisaishi) is a fucking genius. This is absolutely the best fantasy film ever made. It refutes the argument that fantasy can't be deep and thought-provoking.

3. Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (manga). The film is bloody brilliant. However, the manga is simply better because it's more extensive. There's more time for other characters as well. For example, our favourite character ever from Miyazaki's canon: Kushana. Please read it. You do not know what you are missing.

 

4. All other Miyazaki films starting from Nausicaä (1984) to Wind Rises (2013). Go to his Imdb page to get the full list. Wind Rises is a recommendation for those who generally don't care for anime. The man is unable to make a bad film.

5. Neon Genesis Evangelion (the series). After we found out that the film wasn't even originally part of the story but a giant fuck-you to the complaining fans, the movie is to us the same as Star Wars prequels, ie. it doesn't exist. This series is pretty fucking great. We must be the only ones in existence who actually liked the series' ending. All in all, this show is basically Ender's Game but better. Do watch it and don't you dare skip that opening.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

6. Noir. This show is especially for those who do not hold an interest for anime. Because it lacks all of the usual anime clichés. The animation and music are superb. It's almost baffling to see an anime where women kick ass without being overly sexualized. Sure, much like Trigun this requires a lot of patience as the idea really kicks in later. It is completely worth it though. This series is criminally underrated. We cannot comprehend how this show isn't a household name in geek women circles. Repent all ye sinners.

 

6. Koe no Katachi. We just wrote about it so we don't feel the need to elaborate further. It's just a damn good movie and possibly one of the best coming of age stories out there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

7. Nodame Cantabile (manga).  This is one of the funniest and most heartfelt things you'll ever read. The namesake female character is especially brilliant - she is both funny and serious, which is incredibly rare for women in anime. Also, the romance is surprisingly funny and subdued, unlike most anime romances that come across as disgustingly sappy.

8. Only Yesterday. This is our pick from Isao Takahata. You could watch Grave of the Fireflies, just prepare yourself for the crushing despair to follow. Only Yesterday is very much the opposite to the latter. It's so happy and incredibly sweet. We love the watercoloured background that gives this movie its distinctive visual look.

9. Rurouni Kenshin (manga - Remembrance arc). You can watch the OVA, but the manga is better so we'd suggest that you listen to the OVA's soundtrack (which is awe-inspiring) while reading this arc from the manga. If you want, you can watch the Shishio Makoto arc from the anime (the music and animation are pretty great) but it has substantial problems. The creator botches the main female character. It has other issues as well, but that's the worst one. The Remembrance arc is some seriously good shit though.

10. Bleach (manga). This is the most basic anime/manga we have on this list. It's your usual teenboy hero power accumulation fantasy story. Iiiiiit's pretty okay though. It's surprisingly entertaining, because all the characters are actually likeable. If you want to torture yourself, you can also check out the anime that never had the last arc, thus making it feel incomplete. We would advise against watching it also since the gazillion filler episodes do not make it worth your while. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

11. Berserk (manga - Golden Age arc). You can read the first three volumes as well, but the Golden Age arc is the best one. The story's basically a variation on the Arthurian melodrama (think Arthur, Guinevere, Lancelot) with a mix of Faust. This is our Game of Thrones and much like GOT, the creator did not know when and how to finish the story. We appreciate that the manga shows all the nobles as horrible depraved people unlike most other fantasy does. Unless you really hate women, we would urge you to stop reading the manga when the group descends to Hell. 

12. Ranma 1/2 (manga). It's crazy and it's funny. You can read the whole thing, the last chapter is still actually really funny. And dear god, do not skip anything that has Nabiki in it. Our personal favourite chapters would be the Romeo & Juliet ones. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

13. Fullmetal Alchemist (manga). We have some mixed feelings about this. Because we would have wanted that this story would have taken the depressing male characters from the 2003 series and the female characters from the manga. Furthermore, if those had been combined with the music and visuals from the 2003 series, that would truly be something to behold. Alas, the best thing about the manga is the adults and the flashbacks to the war. 

If you want other recommendations for shits and giggles (aka guilty pleasures), we can give them privately.

Kimi no nawa vs Koe no katachi

Since the corona started, we haven't been able to go to the cinema, so instead we decided to relive our teenage anime years and have been obsessively watching the old anime crap we saw back in the day but also indulging (or torturing with, we're not really sure) ourselves in some new shit. The first movie we saw somewhere around January and the other one this month. They make a pretty natural comparison, since they both are about teenagers and involve a lot of drama (plus they came out like one year apart). And since we've been watching anime now with kinda new eyes, it doesn't really register as embarrassing or shameful anymore. So, now is as good a time as any to write about our thoughts on the stuff we were so immersed in when we were young. This will be first out of three posts on this subject. We're just gonna write indiscriminately how we see these movies, so we haven't divided the text into different areas.

Kimi no nawa (2016)

Character introductions are actually decent. It reminded us of the good bits of Ranma 1/2 (wacko, sort of out-there humour), since the idea is essentially a body swap - the boy sometimes wakes up in the girl's body and vice versa. Through that they then learn to know each other. It's not a very original idea, but if you can make it work, it can be good. The characters have funny interactions and there's potential for the girl to have some actual depth in her character with her relationship to her dad. But then...we come to the half-way point of the movie, where the plot takes over the characters and they start to act stupid. And when we say stupid, we mean mind-numbingly moronic. One of the things that ruin the characters is the stakes being too high for a cheesy romance flick. But we'll expand on that in just a moment. We're sorry though, we can't get over how goddamn stupid the boy is. When it has been made clear that they forget about each other the minute they change back into their own bodies, it is incomprehensible, and by no one's standards should be considered a grand gesture of romance that the boy writes 'I love you' instead of his own name on the girl's hand. The body swap is your basic cheesy anime romance idea, which, when executed well, can be quite entertaining. This is not that. The stakes are that the girl is dead and she and her entire town were destroyed by a meteor and the boy is the only one who can prevent that from happening. 

First of all, there are supposedly two main characters but when everything about the girl's past and her relationship to her dad is shown through the boy's eyes, that's no longer the case. So you see, the boy writing 'I love you' and not his name makes us eternally frustrated. It means that the boy didn't care enough to actually say it out loud to her when she might die and they can never see each other again. Also, that denies the chance for the girl to affirm her feelings for him, maybe the last time ever. Additionally, it's not just she who's dying but her entire town full of people. Yet her survival is more important for the boy than the other people. What a selfish brat. The most insulting part for us, though, if we're being honest, is when it's shown that the girl cares more and is more upset about forgetting some boy's name than her entire town being destroyed. A film that has as its main characters people who are more concerned about their potential relationship than a city full of people dying, is ludicrous. 

The worst part is that this movie tries to be so poetic and deep when it's simply a corny "destiny love" romance ("destiny love" is a term we coined for every story that wants to be Romeo & Juliet). Now, anybody who reads our blog knows that we love good romance. And romance that is truly well-crafted is deep and poetic. This "destiny love" crap is nothing but shallow and pretentious. Ultimately, perhaps we're just holding a grudge, since this movie has near universal acclaim from both critics and viewers and was finally the film to dethrone Spirited Away as the highest-grossing movie in Japan. That is fucking unacceptable. On the other hand, in the West, shitty movies have in the last 30 years made the most money, so it's about time Japan caught up. And we can't help but feel that part of the adoration for this movie is because it's anime and we hate that kind of thinking. Anime is like any other movie or series - it's entertainment, pure and simple. The positive we have for this film is that it is hand-drawn and it looks about 50 million times better than any CGI trash we are exposed to in today's cinema field. The music is some of the J-poppiest of J-pop we have ever heard and thus insufferable for us (sorry not sorry all J-pop lovers).   



Koe no katachi (2017)

An announcement before we begin: Our lived experience has made us biased for the themes presented in this movie. However, if this was shittily made, we might hate it more than the previous movie. 

The subject matters in this film are depression, loneliness, suicide, and hating and loving oneself. Is it any wonder that we felt an instant connection? Most characters are teenagers in this movie too, but they come across so much more real than in Kimi no nawa. Whereas the high stakes are never addressed in Kimi no nawa, this movie is completely prepared to deal with the high stakes it has set. In this movie, the main character is a boy and we see everything from his perspective - there is no false set up of two main characters. Nevertheless, that does not rob any of the other characters of depth. We were actually amazed how well this film used visual cues and imagery to convey emotion or build character. And though it clearly had a lower budget than Kimi no nawa and has way more CGI in the background, the animation is gripping and knows how to utilize its smaller budget to its advantage. 

The basic story of the movie goes as follows: the boy was a bully in elementary school to this deaf girl who transferred to his school.  He was so cruel to her, in fact, that she was forced to switch to another school. This acted as a catalyst for all his classmates to shun him for his actions. All that together turned him inward and made him consider his actions. But instead of dealing with the emotions and feelings healthily (like talking about them) he starts to live inside his head blaming and hating himself to the extent that he thinks he does not deserve to live. Before killing himself, he wants to make amends to the girl he bullied. In the process, he becomes friends with her and that kind of sets the movie in motion and is a starting point for the main character to begin connecting with other people around him. 

The film has actually bothered to make the girl into a real character - somebody who is self-loathing to the point that she believes she's a burden on everyone and that everyone would be better off if she just died. This is where a connection is created between the main character and the girl. They are, in fact, the same. The realization that two people who were introduced to us as complete opposites with totally different backgrounds and personalities can have the same human experience. The story's point is basically learning to love oneself and human connection. Simple and incredibly effective. We love all the characters and love that the film doesn't treat anyone as a villain. The boy's best friend is a particular favourite of ours. All in all, this movie is wonderfully heart-warming, uplifting and life-affirming in the best sense. We would unreservedly recommend this nugget of cinematic gold to everyone.       

Disney's artistic bankruptcy

Of all the Disney's mediocre remakes, I ( Jenni writing solo again) never thought it would be the Lion King that would actually make me so angry I wanted to bash a Disney excecutive's head in. Don't get me wrong, I love the original animation, but when I was a kid it was always the one I loved the least of the first four Disney reneissance films. However, this movie awoke a visceral reaction in me that the other remakes did not, even though they are all pretty bad. I would say, outside of Cats, this remake might be the worst movie I have seen from 2010's. And even Cats was gloriously, entertainingly horrible. This other cat movie, not so much. It is a lifeless, murky mess where you can't see anything when it's dark and the world is completely flat of distinctive colour even in daylight. At least the other remakes had some human faces that showed *some* emotion; here it is like looking at an empty vessel, devoid of any kind of recognizable emotion. Sigh. And Disney used to be really good at manipulating people's emotions with their blatant appeal to feelings.  

I make it no secret that I believe Disney has really gone downhill artistically since they adopted the "no more hand-drawn animation" rule in the 2010's. Even though most of their offerings in the 2000's were crap, I could still admire the artwork that went into their hand-drawn animation style. CGI does not offer me the same visual pleasure. In fact, CGI, unlike traditional animation, is fairly limited in what it can show - it can't switch animation styles all that much and looks mostly the same, the expressions in characters' faces can't really be exaggerated to the same extent and the colours are always flatter. Hand-drawn animation ain't perfect either by any measure and it is much more expensive to make, but it holds far more visual interest and potential to beauty than CGI ever has. To me, CGI has always been exactly the same as all other special effects - something that should enhance the film's visuals and not replace existing effects (be they actors, make-up, practical effects, etc.), which seems to be its purpose in modern cinema. By itself, CGI is nothing but one special effect among others and if one insists making the entire movie of CGI, The Lion King remake is what it will look like at its worst.   

The film differs in no meaningful way from its original animated source. That is a problem that plagues most Disney remakes but it is especially egregious in their Lion King remake. The events are the same, the music's the same and most of the characters are the same, except it all looks much much worse. I do not think I have ever seen anything more devoid of emotion than this film. There is not a shred of sincerity in this movie - which granted, Disney does not always have in their offerings, but even in those cash grabs I could at least admire the artwork. Not the case here. The film constantly slaps you in the face with how unbearably ugly it looks. That should not be - the original Lion King is one of the best looking films Disney ever made. It has breath-taking colours with sharp and detailed animation. Though it's no wonder that Lion King looks pretty good, when it took its inspiration from probably Disney's best-looking animation ever, Bambi. And Bambi, though its story and characters aren't the greatest, looks so damn beautiful that it makes you cry. And when we are talking about films, aesthetic matters. CGI is a big part why a lot of films nowadays have cheap aesthethic. They look like crap - colour is hard to distinguish even when it is supposedly daylight, when it is dark one can barely see anything and in general a lot of the background looks blurry. I've found that the older I've gotten, the more I have started to care about movies' aesthetic. The characters still reign supreme, of course, but bad visuals can affect characters as well - like in this remake. It is extremely hard to feel anything for characters that show no emotion whatsoever. At least in CGI - animations the characters do show emotion and real animals are real, so they are way more impressive than computer-generated ones.

From Bambi. Look at that and tell me it's not amazing.

In the original Lion King the characters were already kinda all over the place but here they have somehow managed to make all of them worse. They basically took away Simba's would-be character arc about learning from one's past (which, granted, didn't go anywhere in the original animation) or accepting his divine call and responsibility as king. Especially the whole mystical divine kingship theme is greatly reduced in meaning in the live-action version, since everything looks so reality based. Scar is greatly diminished as a character already at the film's beginning by cutting his song (instead of in the last 3rd like the animation) and trying to make him into an even more obvious version of Claudius than the animation. The bond between father and son, Mufasa and Simba, is not really focused on in the beginning, so once the tragedy strikes, it is hard to feel for any of the characters involved. Also, the remake trying to make justifications for why the hyenas are evil turns out lazier than just making them evil. And this remake did something that I did not believe was even possible - it made Nala worse. Nala is already a non-character in the animation (as an adult) so making her even less so is quite a feat. I should have guessed that they'd erase all of Nala's personality when she was a kid, since erasing female characters' personalities is pretty much a feature in these Disney remakes, but it did surprise me that they managed to unimprove her adult self. Instead, Nala is a nagger all throughout the movie and affects absolutely nothing or nobody in the story. Timon & Pumba I sort of enjoyed, but even they have this strange cynical undertone that they never had in the animation. All in all, I think this film is a perfect encapsulation of both Disney's complete creative collapse and the state of modern Hollywood cinema - endless sequels, prequels, remakes (or "reimaginations") and even when something original is occasionally thought up, it is usually full-to-the-brim CGI. Maybe I am old-fashioned, but I see it as a true tradgedy of the film industry that so much hand-crafted talent, like practical effects and traditional animation, has been almost completely replaced by CGI, where the work might not be as rewarding and fullfilling as creating things with one's own hands.   



   

Characters we shouldn't fancy

The title is pretty self-explanatory. This list probably reveals a little too much about how fucked up peoples' (ours) infatuations can be. Everyone has them, and thankfully they are only fancies. We don't wholly buy the Freudian subconciousness bs. It's pretty straightforward, the more of a bastard the character is combined with how attracted we are to them determines the listing. Honourable mentions go to Robert De Niro in Heat ('cause duh) and Denzel Washington in American Gangster (again duh). Obviously a lot of this depends also on the talent and charm of the actor. And since we are unfortunately 0 % gay or bi, it's all men. Even with that, though, Barbara Stanwyck in Double Indemnity came pretty close making the list.

1. Schindler's List - Amon Goeth. We really didn't want to have him here and we probably fancy him the least on this list, but the fact that there is even a little bit of attraction qualifies him to be #1. Because he's the worst. He's a genocidal maniac. Who has a bit of charm. How fucked up can one's brain get?

2. Jessica Jones - Kilgrave. This guy's a full on rapist (insert It's Always Sunny joke here) yet the way he is played fascinates us. Having someone take your freedom and independent thought away from you terrifies us, as women, more than anything. It's so wrong to fancy this character. 

3. Taboo - James Delaney. This is the character we're most attracted to on this list, he's simply not as horrible a person as the first two. He's a violent murderer and drives his sister insane and to commit suicide, so he's pretty bad too. He's the main character though, so the viewers are given more time to understand and even sympathise with him.

4. The Fall - Paul Spector. He's a serial rapist and killer so pretty clear why he's on the list. The last season chinks away at his character a bit, but it's still an interesting character. We wish the actor went more this route instead of the other poorly chosen projects he's done.

5. Hud - Hud. First off, we didn't get the still we wanted and if you've seen the film, we're pretty sure you know the scene we're talking about. Even Paul Newman could not get this character to be in the realm of likeability. He's not meant to be there either. He's an attempted rapist for god's sake. This character is the definition of toxic masculinity. But Paul Newman, man! Really good movie as well. Seriously, watch this film!

6. A Streetcar Named Desire - Stanley. Man, we have an alarming amount of rapists on this list, don't we? Well, they say that most women have some form of a rape fantasy so we guess we're no different. We've actually never fancied Brando the actor, only some of the roles he has played. Nevertheless, he has a shit ton of charisma, as demonstrated in this role. 

7. The Godfather Part II - Vito Corleone. In real life, this is the character that probably comes closest to someone that we'd actually fancy. He's a ganster and a killer, but he has other qualities. He's reliable and that's something that we gravitate towards in reality. Obviously, we still wouldn't.

8. Dead Man Walking - Matthew Poncelet. We only fancy this character when he begins to admit his guilt. Since he has a redemption arc, he's the only one on this list with an admission of guilt and regret over his actions. He still raped and killed someone so it does make us feel, to say the least, morally confused. There's a whole 'nother conversation that needs to happen around that issue.

9. Yojimbo - Unosuke. Another gangster, this time yakuza style. He's awful, but he's pretty cool. We have no excuses, just look at him and tell us you wouldn't.

10. Sense & Sensibility - Willoughby. He's last because he doesn't rape (at least according to historical context) or murder anyone. However, he's still a bastard. He abandons a 15-year-old girl he got pregnant and then marries for money 'cause he got himself in debt. It's pretty despicable. The best version of the character is the 1995 film.